Journey from the Mountains to the Ocean.

Today we have spent a lot of time talking about heroes. Memorial Day has always been a day that Tim and I have tried to take the time to think about the sacrifices others have given for us.

In the past I visit the graves and have my conversation with Aunt Audrey, stop by Uncle Frosty, Aunt Ione and then more recently Matthew Sheppard. Out here there are cemeteries everywhere. They are so precious. Preciously created for the dear loved ones that are there. Last week we went by one on our drive about that had one huge oak tree in the center. Every headstone was under the canopy of that tree all crowded around soaking up the shade. Tim said, " Dont you know that every Mama there had said their loved ones, I jest wont to be burried under that ol tray.? And it looks as though those last wishes came true.

So today we try to define what a "Hero" is. I was wondering why it is I have so many, and Tim was wondering why he had so few. I think I have more problems with the difference between the words admire and heroism, and I admire so many people and feel so many people should be seen as heroes. Tim said he feels the reason he has so few is because his definition is so narrow that few people could live up to it.

So I have decided to tell you another story about someone elses hero. ----
When I taught at DM, one of the assignments for the students was to write a 5 paragraph, 7 sentences per paragraph, report on their hero. One of my favorite 8th grade students chose Mark Martin the NASCAR driver. In Garrett's rough draft he was having a terrible time writing enough sentences to create a paragraph.
"My hero is Mark Martin. He drive the number 6 car. I have always thought he was cool. He is a great driver. I hope he wins this year. END OF REPORT.
Knowing this wouldnt do, we were to help each student with the editing. So I ask When did you first see Mark Martin.? He said," when I watch racing with my dad. " I said that is cool. Do you like him because he drives Ford? " Yeah, and because my dad likes him. " I said, does your dad race stock cars or anything? "No he is a great mechanic and can fix anything but we cant afford a car. My dad is going to get one though when I get older and I will drive and my dad can be the mechanic." I said, Well why dont you write about that in your paper. Is that what Mark Martin did? I am still digging information out trying to figure out why this kid likes Martin. Finally after playing 36 questions that end with Yep. I say do you know any interesting facts about Mark Martin. He says yeah, one. Ok what is it. He looks at me and says Did you know Mark Martin was a terrible alcoholic and he is in recovery. He doesnt do it at all anymore. Thats why he is my hero. WOW thats the key. OK now we have something. So I say, ok lets work with that.

Heres a bit of background on Garrett. Great kid, will work hard as long as he is in front of you. No homework will ever get done or taken home. Great leader among peers. Defender of the weakest kids, hero to the shy ones. Player with the girls, started gellling his hair in 9th grade, the first time a girl blinked her eyelashes at him. Constantly tardy, often dirty and always always wears the same shirt, pants and shoes. Sometimes battered and bruised always easily explained to falling down out fishing. He carries a rage and temper that I have pushed twice. Each time requiring me to ask," Can you make it to the office or do I you need help." That means a call to security because I cannot safely turn my back on him. He makes it to the office and lockers are repairable. He also has a smile that would steal the hearts of thousands, Outstanding fisherman, lives in Paradise Valley close enough to fish the river as often as he can.
Garrett has younger siblings, I am not sure how many- I know of one sister he has mentioned.

Garrett gets home from school and has chores. Grandma lives a few blocks away. When he gets chores done, he can go down to Grandmas. He has a younger sister and he takes care of her after school. She has chores too which she seldom does. She is 8, a real pain. Garrett's day evolves around a phone call or a message on the table--whether or if dad is coming home. IF dad is coming home, and there is a list of chores they better get done or there will be hell to pay. If dad calls and is stopping by the Beacon before he comes home, Garrett kicks it into high gear and does chores and takes Sissy down to Grandma's before dad gets home. If Sissy wont comply and Dad comes drunk, and things arent just so....HELL TO PAY. Garrett has taken many a slug for Sissy. Garrett cant wait to get big enough to take Dad... someday. It burns inside of him. Garrett knows dad is dangerous but Dad feel so bad, and so there is always a nice gift. One time it was a crate with a motorcycle engine and fenders, that dad won at the Beacon in a bet. "We are going to fix that bike up for you Garrett, " Maybe you can race Motocross." Always with hope and always with the best intentions. Garrett attends counseling in every form available that the school can provide, and in counseling he learned that Dad can "recover." He doesnt have to drink. And Garrett believes that if Dad just has a hero, someone like Mark Martin who has already been through it, he can do it too. Garrett is sure that if Mark Martin can do it Dad can too. Dad is already a hero to Garrett, the tragedy is that Dad knows it and cannot help the disease he has. Garrett is sure Dad needs a hero, so he picked Mark Martin because Garrett thinks Mark and Dad are so much alike. Great men, great mechanics and just one little problem.
For his determined hope, Garrett is my hero. I hate his Dad. I hate that I have to watch this child live the double life of a alcoholic's child. He story isnt unusual, the statics of alcoholism are beyond our reach. But Garrett still believes that he has the answer. He knows what this problem needs. Garrett is a care giver and a problem solver. He carries the weight of it every day on his shoulders, and some days its so heavy, he just needs someone to ask, Can you make it by yourself or do you need help? He has a hero, and is just waiting for that hero to help.
So if you ever watch Nascar, and you see Mark Martin look closely at the wrinkles in his face, and the gray in his hair. He is more than a man who turns left for 5 hours every Sunday. He is one young mans only hope.

Posted by Tim at 2:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

Today its all about Education I would like to invite all who read this to share all their opinions. This about learning. So teach me why this is such a negative aspect of America.

Not personal blogging today. JUST questioning the American Educational System.

My sister just as in LAST WEEK graduated from Casper College. Congrats to her!!!
But you know she doesnt feel better, she doesnt feel like she succeeded in something to make her american life better. DO you know why? Because in several of the classes she did the teaching.
Brief explanation-- Casper College offers online classes because they have very very limited offering of class times for anyone who isnt 19 years old and have a life to attend classes 9-3. ( I m a bit bitter about that myself.) ANYWHOOO the answer becomes the online classes.

Heres the deal. You sign in, the teacher has weekly assignments which can include chat groups or just email between students and teacher. There is also the teacher who puts up 26 tests that have green time boxes that you have to make sure you take and pass at 80% in order to go on. You buy the book you take the test, bingo you are a clinical psychologist.
Then there is the teacher that decides to set up partner learning and you get partnered with some random person and you are suppose to discuss the economic basis of KAZATSTAN. and Saturday night at 6:00 come to the chat room with your partner to discuss you findings. You meet your partner who immediately says I am not good at geology, I dont know where Kazatstan is. You cant help but say...Its a new country, it probably wasnt on the last map you saw which was in 7th grade. ( Am I bitter? not really. )
When you divide the assignment workload and then ask to meet again on Wednesday she says sure. You come in on Wednesday ready to get this thing done because you still have 3 loads of laundry to get done and tomorrow is a tax audit for your boss and she says she didnt get to it because she was so tired. Volleyball practice and a friendly drinking game called quarters kept her out all night. You realize you are of an age that you dont want to mother YET ANOTHER child,

Thats really the age old educational stupidity trick called peer teaching, it a teaching cop out which is "I can t teach this so let someone else do it." Or in the rational of NCLB, there are many ways to learn and teacher delivery isnt always the way to reach students. CRAP CRAP CRAP!!! You do all the work, jerk that is skating through the class continues to skate, he will get the best grade in his whole F********** life because you ( BORN AN RAISED WITH WORK ETHIC) will do an amazing job. Teacher effort ---priceless. or should I say worthless.


and wonder what has this got to do with college. IT has everything to do with it.
You go back with enthusiasm of learning, growing and meeting a community of people with not necessarily like minds but perhaps fresh minds that friendships will be based on. You are tired of jobs that you see the guy who uses his bachelors degree in communications start at Step K-13 on the pay scale, while you with your high school honors degree from long ago will start at minium wage until you can prove or "learn" the system. You just want to be self supporting. Not to live the wild American dream, just to live well enough to be self sufficient and not have to compete with the cats for food each night. LIFE LONG LEARNING thats the key. You think wow I have time now, no kids, I was good student I can do it. ---------Yes ma'am and for only 115$ a credit hour ( instate tuition) you too can get an Associates degree with only 12,000$ because we are going to change your requirements every two years so that those classes you were only able to get in Spring 99 will not longer "TRANSFER" to our house of higher learning.

Lets open it up about Pay scale--Whats the price of money these days?
Kristofer has high school education ---career started at 17worked hard through every hoop set in front of him. 10 years experience in the job. Yearly wage ??
Brian hasnt completed college degree but is brilliant writer ---career for last 2 years with overtime is enough to travel Europe once a year.
Dan--all the right things--college earned by high school achievement and some student loans--now works at university--deans wages?? probably not I doubt he is umpiring summer games for his fun and enjoyment ( although Dan we all know you would do it without pay. but thats another code of ethics we are not talking about)
Tamara ---college education--student loaned all of it --- now working in the business of her dreams, but not using the college knowledge she worked so hard to have unbeatable, unmeasurable ambition is what promotes her with her field She has worked 2 jobs since she entered the work force at 16. ( Another Blog should follow this. All of you, men should do something about this injustice of equal wages for equal work it has gone on too long and change must come from within you. --Will she ever earn the same wages as husband or friends?
Cathy---Associates degree, no bonus at work for earning a degree,she has some minimal college loans---5 years in a job not related to any field she is interested in but makes a living wage for her and cat family.

Will Cathy go on to higher education? Probably not. Why Not because of what you think. She is burned out. Burned out in a way that all of America is. Its a kind of tiredness that comes with constantly battling a system. Its a system of jumping through hoops, dog and pony shows, doing what the teacher wants instead of what you know is right. Being graded at the teachers disgression, Reading a book and answering questions that were written without the proper punctuation let alone proper grammar by a college professor. Politically, its about college opportunities hindging on Saturdays game against a top ranked team. More exposure on the court/field earns more dollars in the deans budget. Its all the reasons why America will never be ranked anything but 196th in education. I told this as Cathy's story but I was using my own frustration because Cathy and I traveled the same road, sometimes side by side. You will ask me if South Carolina is any better. I looked up the stats... USC raised its ranking up to 52 in Kiplingers best colleges. Clemson was rated number 1 in 2001 in architecture. ( It says nothing about the rest of the curriculm. ) I dont have accurate enough information to make a educated statement about South Carolina education so I wont. I do know they do compete with Wyoming in worst public school ranking. We battle for 48 and 49th right before California. I know UW and Citadel have battled on the football field. UW and Clemson will never compete against each other.
Please remember also these college rankings are based on VERY divserse information. One of the accrediation points was how much public service the student body did. Presybe College won that one and is ranked in top 15 best colleges in USA. Every ranking book has different criteria.
APPLES AN ORANgatans as far as I am concerns. No I didnt spell oranges wrong.I was trying to be funny.

Why isnt college free????????? Why???????
My final statement and the one I wish someone could prove me wrong on, is a very simple one. I wish for the graduating high school seniors of Wyoming, that they would pursue academia in any college in the world outside of the UNIVERSITY. Here is why ---Three simple words that have ruined and broken too many lives -Office of Student Records. Need I say more?? I wasnt even trying to be funny, but I bet Brian Van Hise is saying, " Preach on sister!!"

Posted by Tim at 4:46 PM | Permalink | Comments

Lesson 4 this week is about assumptions. Before we begin let me state my opinion. Ok I don't really support TV viewing. I have always thought there were so many other things to do rather than watch TV all day long.

I have my favorite "programs" as Tim's grandmother would call them, but I have to mercilessly cheer for this program on Discovery.
CASH CAB!
I love love love trivia. I suck suck suck at trivia. I am no K Jennings.

But this show is so fun
You get a taxi in New York and it lights up and you are on the cash cab. You earn precious dollars by answering trivia questions. Decent Trivia questions, like ones someone got from the newspaper headlines and geography and stuff. Not Words that start with the letter Q-- what is a quince.

now here in lies the lesson.
you see the contestants hailing the cab. And some of them ( if you are Lisa Hebbert ) think WOW what a chowder head. He will never make it to his destination, and he is the one that ends up knowing Nostradamus' birthday, and walking away with 900$ in cash.
Then you see him pick up 2 little ladies from Wisconsin that have had one too many strawberry margaritas and need to find their way back to their hotel. They seem like 2 silly little housewives"gone wild" and they start answering those headline questions or countries whose names end in stan and holy moly they are like Minnetoka head librarians. They clean up.

Then there are the strange couples. He knows all about art, art history, art pre history, prehistoric cave painting, and she can tell you the ingredients in Black truffle souffle. This is the funny part too. There is the red light challenge. While they are at the red light you can earn 200 dollars by answering question in 10 seconds. Stuff like the last 5 presidents. The presidents on currency. The 2 ladies from Wisconsin cannot pull this one out of their head. What's the deal with that.

You also get to have help from outside you get one phone call for help, and you can do a street shout out. You know the contestant, usually some overly made up young YUPPIE lady who hasn't a clue, she uses the shout out on the first 25$ question. What color is this cab? The next question---How many pennies makes a dollar? She phones a friend. And so you just have to watch because you know he is going to bounce her out of there. Third Question, In the Yucatan pennisula what is their major commodity? Her answer Tanning beds? BAM she is gone and it gets really good if it has started to rain and she has atleast 24 blocks to her destination. hahahahaha I love this show.
You assume so much about people by the first impression you get. The guy with dread locks, hippie or college professor, family from Ohio--knuckleheads, Upwardly mobile young Wall Streeters--probably successful in the cash cab--NOPE DUMMY HEADS. Knowledge cannot be measured. It also cannot be judged by outward appearance although we all do that every instant. (Tim has a entire sermon on the effect of grits on the southerners smile and why it makes them talk funny. )
The last ones I have to tell you about, are a group of Irish businessmen on their way after a long day of work to the pub. They get in the cab and are so much fun. They collectively know every trivia detail of the Louve, they know

Right now the show is only in New York. If you ever go there try hard to get on it. Hang around Empire State Building, he seems to be there a lot. I tell you, I am already ready. If I ever get on there, Tim , Elizabeth, Kris Tamara and Shannon will be in the van with me , we will keep Aunt Cathy or Grandmother on speed dial and I will only hope all those nights of watching Lassie, Magnum PI, Cowboy night, Little House on the Prairie, Simpsons and Southpark will finally pay off.

Posted by Tim at 4:47 PM | Permalink | Comments

I didnt come here to complain about what is wrong with south, rather I came here to embrace it. So this will come as a big surprise that I have one complaint. ( oh actually I have more but this one is a fore runner today.)

Ok for anyone who doesnt know me, I love sleep. I love to sleep and sleep is important to me and I need lots of sleep. However my sister would argue the word need in that sentence.
Tim has an unusual sleep habit, which I am going to insist he blog about because I am unable to explain it. ( please hang with me) but I have to always sleep by the window. In our last apartment, I slept by the window which involved the sound of a beautiful relaxing fountain, as well as the sound of the ambulance/fire station that was 100 ft. away. Some nights on a full moon, the moon would reflect on the pond and bounce light energy right in my eyes which caused me to awake in a full sweat thinking I was being interrogated by the SS. ( You all know how that flashback is for me.) But I persevere over these things, and when I am unable to sleep I dont hold a grudge about it at all. I just make sure everyone who is within a half mile radius realizes that I did NOT sleep that night.
Well at this new apartment we were esctatic about the range of new song birds that we have out side our window. Mockingbirds, blue jays, and cardinals are the only ones we are able to identify. They were nice at first, then cute and really very peaceful but now ----Its just me against them.. Ever since the time changed, I am telling you the little devils are out to get me. THEy dont sing at a reasonable hour. HELL NO!! 4:36. What the hell bird is up at 4:36. There isnt even a decent worm or bug up at that hour. At 4:36 this place sounds like the middle of the Amazon, and if you listen closely you can even hear the tiki birds. Tiki Toucans in Carolina. I dont think so. So I figure its those damn mockingbirds. They mock.. They mock whatever freaking soound they hear. They have a playlist longer than the 1000 song IPod. Its never the same song, and more specifically they do not repeat a song. They dont even repeat the chorus. Oh I hate it. So I tried everything, yelling shuddup, slamming the window shut, and Margie. I just let Margie out on the porch and told her to have at it. She likes them. No killer instinct there. I am ready to go to more severe measures. I know you are all nervously awaiting to tell me that" Its a Sin to kill a mockingbird." I know I love the book, but its just a book. I looked up the 10 commandments and there isnt one thing in there about mockingbirds. NOTHING, just a lot of coveting this and that, no mockingbirds. I am going back to the ear plugs and pillow over my head, and we are moving the bed. After my continual reminding Tim about this problem, he did suggest that I should feel lucky that they cannot mock a harley davidson without pipes or the garbage truck that comes at 4:48 on Tuesdays. He can always find a rainbow behind every cloud, can't he.
I do want to include in this rant my favorite bird. I love these ibis. They are the cutest darn things. They have totally BRIGHT yellow feet that look like they are wearing galoshes. They are the best ones. And they know the importance of being quiet.

Posted by Tim at 5:09 PM | Permalink | Comments

I have been looking forward all week to this entry. I m going to tell you some funny stories about my Mom but I got to thinking I should atleast introduce her to you first.
If I were introducing her at gala event the first thing I would tell you about her is that she is the smartest person I have ever known. Her strategy is this. If she doesnt know something, whatever it is you are asking, give her some time and she will find out. She was the internet long before the internet was invented. If my Mom had been born in another time, I am sure you would now know her name very very well as one of the most successful NBA coaches of our time. She is a brilliant strategist. I have often thought of sending Phil Jackson her number for help. In the off-season she could easily pick up the general manager jobs of any Major League baseball team, and I think in her heart she secretly awaits a call from George Steinbrenner. Since the Yankees have Haliburtons budget to spend on their team, Mom prefers to help the underdog Colorado Rockies. She has very very good advice for them, unfortunately they change GM's and head coaches so fast, we havent been able to get her phone number spread around their office.

I used to compare my Mom with my friend's moms. You know the grass is always greener. I remember Julie Lynch's mom would let her do anything. I mean it- not once did that woman say no, that isnt a good idea. I knew I didnt want her to be my Mom because there were ideas that Julie had that I was hoping an adult would put a stop to. I just about freaked out when I was friends with Randy Dearth, I told him I couldnt go riding bikes because I had to clean my room, and he said he didnt have to clean -they had "a Lady" come and do it for them. I couldnt believe that luck. They did have a brand new double wide but they only had 2 kids and each kid had their own room -AND Mrs. Dearth didnt work. I always thought I wanted to be Mrs. Dearth until I learned what a stay at home mom did versus a working mom. Mrs. Dearth was bored to tears, did nothing ,and hated Big Piney. They only survived there one year. I had a working mom. We lived there for 10 very happy years. I am proud I did. Even though at the time ,the draw back was having to clean. Sheryl Williams' mom was a nurse. She had a great sense of humor but she would talk to you about nurse stuff, guts and poo. She was a little too graphic for me. I was glad she wasnt my Mom. Sylvia McDonald. Now there was a MOM. WOW She came over one day and told us that she and the kids had just made marshmellows and she couldnt get the goop out of the new kitchen carpet or her clothes. I thought WOW what a mess! My Mom of course knew the solution. I kinda leaned toward wanting Sylvia as my mom because she seemed so fun, until I went over to house to help her try to "organize" MOUNT Sylvia. It was a mound, I am not kidding you as high as her second floor set of stairs of pieces of polyester fabric that she was going to make into quilts or something. It had been there for months. OK, I could not cope with a house that messy nor waking up to Mount Sylvia every day. What if someone was living in that heap?

I have always admired Marcia Elliott. She is a great mom. I had never seen a family run with such military precision. Their fridge was an amazing set of schedules and calendars that ran as smoothly as you can imagine. There were 6 main little Elliotts and at any given moment, she could tell you that Ricky had practice at 2:30 and Vern's next game was Friday night at 6:00 against True Drilling. And to make it worse for her, she said it was ok whenever the kids wanted to have a friend over. I was lucky enough to be included in many Elliott outings and I have never had so much fun in group in my life. The only strategy I could figure out that she used was the head count system. She would check how many heads were in the station wagon and away we would go. But as I got to know Marcia better, there was one thing that scared the hell out of me.

Marcia like my Mom, knows alot about sports and particularly Little League Baseball. She actually knows enough that she really should have been a coach and GM------ but she would share what she knew with the Umpire--- who she believed did NOT know the game as well. The great thing about Marcia was that she didnt yell at the ump just for her own child. She yelled at him for any call he made that didnt help the team. She would yell at him about Everything. Once Vern had to come out of the dugout and ask Her to be quiet. The first time I heard her yelling, I was so surprised, shocked and stunned I didnt know what to do. I was so scared that she was going to get " in trouble" and get ejected then we werent going to have a way to get home and I would get in trouble. I thought they would certainly have to jail her to contain her. When we did get home, I remember telling my mom all about it and she just laughed and said," Sometimes people feel that way about the game." I thought ok, but I am so glad you are my Mom. You would never say anything to an ump.

Hallmark knows that there are a million ways to describe a mom and your love for them because it is hard to put into words how much they mean to you, but there are somethings in this world that when I see them I always think of Mom. Like a cup of coffee next to a piece of chocolate cake, or a piece of toast. White Keds, the words "Spring House Cleaning or Fall House cleaning." Mauve carpet. Aqua-Net hair Spray, the smell of Pinesol and flowers. Gallardia, perenniel daisies, matrakaria, blooming Clematis, nicatianna and all the ones with neat names, like lambs ear, dusty miller, money plant and little red tulips, and dutch iris. My mom can grow anything.( given the right soil she would say). She loves to teach gardening to the beginner and the semi expert. She knows more Latin names for plants that anyone should, and the funniest piece of garden advice she ever gave me was, "Lisa , just remember green up and brown down." I laughed so hard I thought I would wet my pants at that one. Was it because so many of my green plants were brown that she thought I had gotten them mixed up.


Mom used to be a strict diciplinarian, she isnt anymore because we are all perfect, but thats another story. I have thought alot about how she did this. I dont have the answer but Ill tell you how it was growing up under her reign. I didnt "DO" or "TRY" a lot of things because I was afraid I would get in trouble. I never knew the depth or width of the word trouble, it was left to my own imagination I guess but it was enough to keep me from doing some shennigans that I was tempted to. I was afraid of her, I will tell you. But more importantly I was afraid of breaking her heart, disappointing her or embarrassing her. All of which I know I have done and dont even know when I did. but I tried. In fact I overachieved at this one. I was so afraid of "it", I would tell her ahead of time or tell her I was thinking of doing it. In school, I had never played hookie ( ditched) a day. So when I was a senior I thought I would try it with a girlfriend. I set it up on a day I didnt have any afternoon classes and then I went to the nurse faked being sick and instead of driving home, got my girlfriend who was waiting outside of NCHS and we drove around all afternoon. When the school called my mom and said I hadnt shown up for class, she said I know I think she is home sick." She helped me because I told her what I was doing. What a great partner in crime.

In my life, my Mom has been a 4H leader, a blue-bird mother but the motto she follows from these groups is TO ALWAYS BE PREPARED.. HOLY Crap I have to tell you my mom is the best, She can pull a 8 course dinner or a EMT kit with blood pressure monitor out of her purse. (Not quite but almost.) Next time you are out and you see her ask her for a q-tip and she will have one in her pocket I swear. Last month, we 8 of the gang including Shannon, were at the OPENING DAY game for the Rockies. Cathy, who is an amazing event coordinator, organized us all into getting some good old Baseball food. Rockie dogs, pulled pork sandwiches, nachos, popcorn peanuts candy and drinks. Before we went up to get it, we asked Mom and Dad what they wanted. Dad would be a sport for one of everything but Mom is a bit more limited eater. She did chime in for the ROCKIE dog, if we could get it plain with just a little mustard, and salad dressing if they have it. I have YET TO SEE ANYONE eat Salad dressing on a hotdog!!! MOM- come on. Its the Stadium. They put kraut, chili jalepenos, onions relish, but I doubt they have salad dressing. (I guess she thought it never hurts to ask.) SO we get the dogs, WHOA and Cathy got it loaded. GOD BLESS us all. Rockie dogs are foot longs. We take the food back all squished and slurpy across the laps of 3 business men and sit down and pass it all out. Dad eats his just like a champ. WE plow through ours and are chewing away when I notice my Mom trying to get in her purse. I offer to help and hold her hot dog wondering what she needs when I realize I forgot the napkins. She pulls out a beautiful hankie that she will use as her napkin. Then she pulls out this little black case with a little set of those collapisible scissors in there. She whips them out CHA-CHING and begins to cut her 12 in. hotdog into 4 sections that she can eat a bit more daintily. I am watching her in amazement as I wipe the relish off the end of my nose and think OH MY GOD only Mom would be so prepared. SHe is so cute and God I love her.

If any of us are ever described as generous it is because of the example set by Mom. There are a million ways to be generous, with time, love patience and money and Mom is all of those, but ask any Reynolds, Hebbert, Hendrickson, and Hall and they will tell you most generously with money. You probably would want me to list the charities she has devotedly donated too, I am sure there are some, but mostly its the Reynolds, Hebbert, Hendrickson and Hall Charitable Foundation. If you have need she will help, even if you don't she will help. Even if the need is something you just wanted for a long time, she will help. If you want to go to movies and are a few bucks short of the $2 cheap seats she will help. We tease about the Hendrickson Savings and Loan with the revolving door, but its true. And when you ask to borrow a little til payday, and I promise I will pay it back, when you return to pay it back, She always says," Now are you sure you can afford this.?" I love that. and because she told me to always be honest, I would say," Sure, I can afford it today but hang on to it in case I need it next week." We just laugh.

There are too many Christmas' to tell you, that would not have been if it had not been for Mom. Mom doing all the baking because we didnt have time or money, she paid for and cooked the Christmas eve Buffet, Christmas dinner Ham, Turkey or Prime Rib because all combine if we had pooled our money we wouldnt have enough to get to Mini Mart and buy twinkies. She is the reason we all feel about money the way you should. Its nice to have but better to share. Best Financial advice I ever had in my life, was "Watch your pennies the dollars take care of themselves"....Mom. She would say her best advice to us is Pay Yourself First. ITs not her best and that one doesnt work for me, because I always think I am more valuable than the gas bill and thats why I always have to come over before payday.




Its time to mention the most important aspect of Mom. She rules our world. She is known as Grandmother. "Grandmother said you have to.... Grandmother wont like that.. You better not do that or Ill tell Grandmother" She is the muscle behind the punch. I have used her name to threaten, cajole and motivate my kids hundreds of times. They have done the same thing to me. They tell on me. Grandmother commands respect. I love that because it seems like the world is swirling quickly down a fast drain of social disorder. No one has respect for anyone any more. Not just kids dont respect their elders, its everybody. SO its very refreshing to know and see that Mom is so loved by them that she earns their respect. This is a funny story, there are many things that we Hebberts have done that have been followed by the words "Dont you ever tell Grandmother." Rusty has had a tattoo on his leg since he was 18 and every time Mom and Dad would drop by he would just about kill himself to jump down the 13 stairs to the basement to put some pants on to cover it. She more than likely knew about it 15 minutes after he got it but has never said a word for or against it, but the kids worry that she would disapprove and they want to please her. Not because they are big suck ups but because you just dont want to break her heart. Elizabeth got her nose pierced when she turned 19 and has more than once faked a sneeze to pull it out while standing at the front door before Grandmother saw it. Well Im pretty sure she saw it long ago at bingo but was nice enough to fake like she didnt or just graceful enough to let it go. And to this day, Elizabeth takes it out so that Grandmother wont be embarrassed or upset by it. I know all there is to know about the psychology of people pleasing, but I truly dont think that has nothing to do with it. I think we all want to please Mom, make her proud, get her to smile or laugh because she is so precious to us. We know what we have and like anything precious to you, you want to keep it safe and in a special place.

So this is my Mothers Day tribute to my Mom, I saved the great stories about how she shot the windows out of my car with a wrist rocket, defended Marcia Elliot with a gun under her robe and out ran by me when we saw a rattlesnake, but Ill save those for another day. She is a crack-shot with a gun, a master chef of slumgullion and sugar cookies, she loves to talk on the phone, she has never weighed more than 98 pounds dripping wet with her heavy boots on, she calls glue musilage, and outside of beating my dad at cribbage, nothing brings her more happiness than the joy of giving. She invented it.

Posted by Tim at 6:52 AM | Permalink | Comments

For whom......

Here we all are, y'all as they say here, finding ourselves on the Edge of civilization again- albeit a different edge than WY ever was.
The journey of these souls has brought a life to life, and out of the drone of the familiar.

The streets here have no names to us as they are merely conveyences to other unknown places, whereas the familiar streets of the other edge were paths to the known. These sentences may seem as randomness, but I assure you they can convey a way of living which can be had by all.

When we think of our lives on a linear timeline, we see a beginning, middle and end. The stuff between is what really seems to matter, though many of us waste and fritter the hours away in the fishbowl in front of our nose.

In the musings herein I shall try to give tools to reflect and illuminate the meat between your ears. As all meat can go Bad, the freshness date has to be changed frequently by reflecting on what Really matters(in your psyche). When ultimitely we only can take what is before our senses to the "souldraft" with us, one must consider frequently the content of this experience we call Life. If your experiences repeat themselves more than can be counted, then maybe a Rut has been formed. When the experiences are painful or non-noticible (auto pilot) the rut can be harmful. This rut can be deep or shallow according to the amount of time in the Life it consumes.
Enough of the basis for the rantings to follow. I have agreed to chronicle the experiences in my Life to this point as theraputic but comical musings, to not be critical of the habitat or sub-species in which we have contact with in this Edge we now inhabit. So call me on it if I seem to be bitter or haughty towards my fellow souls, as I never wish to be of that ilk.

For those of you readers that haven't yet met me in real form, I want you to know that I don't talk this way. My voice is a high pitched whine from Northern CA, reluctantly influenced in the teen and adult years from WY. The content of my Head may be also classified this way. So for that I have no apologies, just remember from whence I came, apple tree makes apples, nuts don't fall far from the tree etc.........
Thank you for your encouragement in this endeavor- Tim

Posted by Tim at 10:09 AM | Permalink | Comments

Next weekend is Mothers Day. A day set aside to recognize Mom's and all they do. We are going to do that. Mothers are an interesting breed. We really do try to be all you expect us to be. But there are times we cant. And when that happens its one of the worst feelings in the world as well as very humiliating.
So to combat that horrible feeling, I decided to be this kind of mom. I wanted the kids to know everything about me. How afraid of the dark I was, I cant swim, I dont see well, I cant cook dinner but I make the best cinnamon rolls ever and I have ALOT of gastrointestinal problems. I am not suppose to around Kris after drinking 8 glasses of water a day
and Elizabeth has spent many a tender moment trying to talk me through the deep end. I wanted my kids to understand that life threatening decisions, such as the need I had to put a bullet in Steve Prentice because that s the only cure I understand to spousal abuse, as well as standing next to Tim when he faces scary medical news ---are all part of life and me. I cant be fake and act like the mature Mom I should, I lean on them. I need them to help me make sense of the world. I am lucky to have kids that I hope see me as wierd/normal and just a lady getting a little wrinkled, whose opinions are usually based on moral codes that only she understands. I am lucky to have two very different people who love me, and think I am ok because they have both picked my head up off the bathroom floor as well as sat next to me at a Rockies game. So before we get into the mushy mothers day things that I will tell you next weekend about my mom and Tim will tell you about his, I realized this week there are two special events that remind me very much of my children and why I am lucky to be their mother.

For those of you that know K and E, either both or one, something you would immediately know about them is their passion for Music. Now K will go for months without a peep of Tool news, or a Deftones update, but it is always on his mind. E rarely lets a day pass without the mention of a U2 lyric, or a Tori update. For those of you that are close to them I would imagine this gets really tiresome, but for me its just amazing. You see all their musical taste came from their father. He is the one that nudged, gently turned up, or loudly belted it out when they were young. We have one rule about music, none of it is bad. There is always something that can be found in any music. Tim and I consciencely sat down and decided that we would never discourage any music or music instrument that the kids wanted to try. We would give it all a try.
Tim is a complete album guy, I am a totally cheesy top 40 including all the CW hits you can stand person. I make up the words I cannnot understand to any song I am singing. WHich as the kids will tell you is always off key.

So this week, Tool will be in Denver on Wednesday May 10. It will be one of the most amazing nights for K. since Shannon was born. It isnt just a band playing a concert, its a much deeper and amazing connection. and I feel the same way. A few years back, I almost lost Kris in an immature standoff of sorts that required me to re evaluate what kind of a person I am and what kind of person was. IT was a Face off moment for me while I watched, actually pushed K right off the edge of my life. I alllllll most lost him. When I finally decided that I couldnt take another minute of it, I decided to have a battle of wits ( come to Jesus) meeting with him via the internet chat system. So this confrontation started off kind of nice, I asked what was he doing. He said listening to Tool. I saud I have never heard of them, is it something you think I would like. He said NOT particularly. I swear to you at that moment, I just snapped. I thought--You know when people cannot speak they sing. What they cannot say the listen for in music. SO I said,
WHY DONT you TRY ME. Please send me some thing. ( also be cause I am such a tight ass I wouldnt go buy an album.) So he did. Tim and I were coming home from a drive about trip we had taken a few days later and I said . Do you want to listen to something Rusty is into? He of course said sure. I can tell you the first song was called the Pieces FIT and I am telling you I was immediately addicted. IT was amazing. DUMB word to use because I have yet to find a word to describe this sound. I love it and loved it and I immediately called K. and I told him. And he thought i was faking and I said no but I have to know everything you can tell me about Danny Carey. "Not in the 40 year old I have the hots for him. "I just want to know where did he learn to play an instrument like that. THERE IS NO ONE ON THE THIS PLANET BORN YET as talented as he is. I am sorry. what you think about your favorite person, but I am telling you NO ONE can touch this guy. The group undescribable in the complete sound. Danny doesnt make the band alone. I then took the time to read the lyrics as Kris so patiently sent them too me time and time again. In the words were many MOM messages, about pain and hurt. I could hear my son crying. So I will tell you, it opened a door for K and I to walk through. A new door that we could let the old bs go and be someone new and start fresh. TOOL did it.
U2 was my idea. I am responsible for pushing play. I wanted Elizabeth to listen to music for something besides lyrics, which is what I thought she was getting from Tori. So one day up on Ridge crest I popped in Streets have no name. She really heard it. Now E has had more musical training than anyone in the family besides Great Grandpa Dave who played fiddle on Saturday nights. She has an ear, she can sing on key anytime and could at the age of 4. So musically she is my go to gal. U2 has added personal depth to her life that cannot be compromised. But Tim is the one that told her all about Red Rocks and Sunday Bloody Sunday. He told her the why behind all their songs. That year was a nasty year for her, but the Lads came out with a new album in October. That album was the only voice she had for two years. She could say more with the songs from that album and she was actually listening to their old ones too, she could finally be heard. I felt like she was speaking in a language I could understand. Which has not been the case with Tori. This week Is BONO's Birthday. Its not a national holiday or an international one, but it should be. His talent cannot be matched. Sorry there is just no one who can make you feel pain, happiness, hurt and pure love like those words and his voice. Elizabeth will be celebrating as if it were her own.
I do need to say that I am proud to have attended a Tool concert with K and family, but I am most ashamed of myself, that I had the opportunity to attend a U2 concert with E and I chose work over her, I will always regret that decision.

These two bands cannot be compared anymore than these two children can. But please if you learn one lesson from this epistle. please let it be this: When you cannot find a way to reach your child, Open their CD case, or drive their car, and listen. DONT Listen throughYOUR heart, listen through theirs. They are telling you or world something that they cannot say. It isnt always bad, please dont get me wrong. Music is the key to understanding life. and its true for everyone. If you really care about someone you will know what music they like and why. Happy Mothers Day, I am the luckiest mom on the planetbecause both of my kids know the lyrics to Tom Petty Free falling, What do you get a Wookie for Christmas When He Already Has a Comb and of course John Denvers Alfie the Christmas tree.

Quote: Its in every one of us to be wise, find your heart and open up both your eyes. We can all know everything without even knowing why. Its in everyone of us by and by.

Posted by Tim at 7:43 PM | Permalink | Comments

So the whole idea of this blog is to keep a record of adventures that we are having. A journal if you will. We have every intention of starting in chronicological order but that probably wont last long, but sincerely we will try.
So for those of you who are new to the Hebbert madness heres the whole story.
Met first day in first class in college. I bought Tim lunch. We dated, we got engaged, we got married June 4, long time ago. First year not much good news to report except we were expecting our first son. He was born on May 16 and is the most brilliant child ever born. We were fortunate to have generous family friends who let us buy a mobile home from them--house payment $159 a month for 5 years. Their kindness will never be forgotten. Sold the Mobile home bought and lost another little house but were blessed again to be expecting another child. Elizabeth was born May 28th the most beautiful child ever born.
Nuclear Family moved to Sunrise Area through the generosity of family we were able to buy the house we will always call home. 1940 Kingsboro Road. Lived there for 18years undeniably the happiest place on earth. Y2K we were blessed again with Daughter in Law,Tamara the brightest diamond we have in our crown. So we are looking pretty much like the Cleavers, complete with white picket fence if you have seen the house. Perfect life, Perfect world.
So we challenge ourselves to step outside the rut we are in. The same jobs, the same place, the expectation of doing things because thats what you do. The Challenge becomes this simple sentence:
IF you could live anywhere you want in the world or US where would it be and why? Well you say We cant because of .....debt, family obligations, house payments, jobs, the dog, I hate moving etc etc etc... but if you could where would you live? BECAUSE YOU REALLY CAN! You just have to want to.
So we moved to South Carolina. For those of you who know us, just skip this part and go right to my speil on Egrets.
What brings you to the South? How did you pick Mount Pleasant? We literally threw darts at map. Really and truly. Because we did research and made lists and did research and thought and called and checkout several ideas. Tim had 12 I had 16 cities that I would love to live in. We tried to eliminate them down and we finally got to 3 each. 6 very different cities. We went for weeks trying to decide. So one night after our MOTHER OF ALL GARAGE SALES!!! we took darts, 3 each. Tim said you go first and I did. I threw all of mine at once at Charleston. Because I have lived in the mountains all my life and I wanted to live "near the ocean" just once in my life. THats it thats the whole psychology of it. Tim never threw one, he just said," Well if you wanted to live near the ocean why didnt you just say it." I didnt because I didnt want him to live my dream I wanted him to have a dream too. He said, I would love to live there, and if it doesnt work out we can always move to my choices." YES WE CAN!!
This really isnt about analyzing the depth of intellect of Tim and Lisa, nor admiring the adventurous albeit mentally questionable spirit. IF you can just take one lesson away from knowing us please let it be this. We all only have so long on the planet, and I know you are right now saying ---Yeah Yeah I heard this on OPRAH, but its true, there is just so much time for each of us, so there is something you want to do, please dont wait until you retire to move to a place that has golf all year around, or warmer weather, or better fishing. Please dont wait until you can afford to change whatever it is. Affording it has nothing to do with it really. Tim and I havent been this poor since our macaroni day's but we havent been this happy... ever. Everyone should be feel like we do. YEAH YEAH, real inspirational but you are telling yourself we can t do it. My husband or wife would never do it. Well talk to them ask, is this where you want to be? Do you have different plans for when we retire? Will we ever be able to retire? If it looks like you will be working until 81 years old like Tim and I will, at least pick a place now that you want to be so that each day when you are going to work you are really digging the fact that everything is green all the time. OR you are seeing a Tree you have never seen before. Because that is where you will find Tim and I, out wondering around looking and getting our eyes full before We cannot See anymore.

If this doesnt sound like the perfect life on rollerskates then to add to our bountiful plate is this a prince was born to us. Shannon McCannon Beck Without a doubt the onlyPerfect person among us. I could tell you it just doesnt get better than this, but it does and that is what this blog is about. To tell you every exciting thing we have done and seen. So welcome to i o p pods blogspot. This is about the Journey from the Mountains to the Ocean from two unlikely explorers who drive ford foci. We have many miles to go before we sleep. See you at the park Shannon!!!

Posted by Tim at 4:06 PM | Permalink | Comments