Journey from the Mountains to the Ocean.

As I have been a welder for the past 30 or so years I have gained the insight of what flesh smells like as it is burning. Now- I know that we have all been stung by the iron, strawberried the elbow or drug the nose on pavement for a hundred yards or so in our lives, so we are all somewhat familiar with that funny smell. In My current position as "welder of new hospital piping in Charleston right over the marina eight floors in the air on top of the tall building" I have rekindled my familiarity with this olfactory delight. So for the duration of Lisa's "vacation" this summer, I started this new job of pipe welder in the sky. The pics may shed some delight on the jobsite as sometimes they do, but to fully appreciate the career move (downward spiral) one must recollect the aforementioned odor. WHY would a 30-ish, goal oriented, breathing, semi- intelligent man choose to be a construction welder again?! no answer here, just fill in the blank.

That is where the Scars portion of our show came from, but the stripes come from the vacation end of this summer. MY summer vacation started as Lisa's did with a trip to Denver on the tail-end of her time with family. I had realized that Kris had a steady tattoo artist he trusted with his skin, so I felt compelled to do the same.

This started with the Cannon's hand print on Kris' arm, I thought that it would be so cool on my shoulder, as he is always there with my thoughts. Then, once the idea of a tattoo being applied to MY flesh was accepted, I fell prey to the same ideas of other posterboard people. What about This... Or this...on my arm? or my ass?

The idea of tattoos had never really caught my attention before, because of the reality of living with someone who detests them --having to look at it......really slowed me down. not to mention the task of deciding...What to draw? What to draw from? What could I possibly want to carry on myself for the rest of my life? Shannon, of course, Lisa's name, of course. My kids, of course. But what has my skin got to do with that, and besides, family really may not want to be on my white pimply ass in 20 more years. Bleah!

So- parusing the magazines that fill my days with and without my wife, I fell on the perfect icon that represented what I want to be associated with for the rest of my visible life. Dragon?, Fish? Barb wire? bluebirds? SKULLS? Nope. The only thing that would exude what I mostly can carry on a conversation about is--Cars. not the Volkswagen, not the Buick, but hotrod cars.

All my walking life I have lived and breathed for the next cool car on the pavement, passing by, in a show, in a parking lot, going to the drags in 1968 with my Dad, The GT races in Vacaville with my Dad, the 1969 Oakland roadster show with MY DAD,

Frank and Dannie's '62 Austin Healey, riding on the "buddy seat", on the TV while my children were being born..You get the picture, obsession. Not just passing interest obsession, but the kind men have with boobies. Yeah, that bad. And all the while, my Dad and family were there, one way or another.

So when I now go to a clan of hotrods in a parkinglot, my right shoulder will tell the story- this guy is fuckin' crazy about cars. Yup, I am, just ask, I'll tell you all about the things. For Hours. This is what that tattoo thing is all about to me. I know that the public at large really doesn't give a flyin' shit about the things people draw on themselves, but when they can relate to that picture, or that cross, or that skull? tatooed on that guy or girl, they will ask.. WTF? Thats when it begins. Do you really want to know? yeah? well let me tell you the story of THIS.

Thanks for sticking with me, family, thru the '29 chevy that din't ever make it outa the garage, the metalflake dark green 68 chevy pickup that nearly crushed a good birthday cake for Dannie, The frenched antennae on the 72 junk green pickup, the '57 Chevy pickup we rebuilt on the driveway, The '34 Ford pickup that actually had a neat motor and BIG headlights, (see a pattern here?) the '64 Thunderbird, the '73 Volkswagen (yeah, that was also a project) the Cragar S/S equipped '93 Ford ranger PICKUP, and finally the mothballed-grey/red '64 Falcon, currently in possesion. Yeah, thats an obsession...all that grocery money.....

Well, I guess I wont rust away, and this is the coolest scar I've gotten so far. Thanks Eileen-at that Scary Place on Colfax, and again, thanks family for being so cool!

I was really gone for 6 weeks. I had the best time. I learned so much about people that I thought I already knew everything about.

And I met and got to hang out with some amazing new people in my life. What is a better vacation than this. Here is all the the stuff Idid. SawCarswithShannonamust (seeif you havent) flewmykiteinthepark, barbequedsteaksinsideoutburgerscornonthecobwithmustard
sauceandpeaches, wentshoppingfortheCannonlotsoftimes, joggedtwice, wenttoCasper, wateredgardens, visitedbookclub, ategreatfood, wenttoBuffaloandSheridan, sawnewnephewandvisitedwithDannieandFrank, ate Chinese, wentbacktoSheridannextday, flewkitewithnewnephewand6yearoldoneandhadtonsoffun, wentbacktoDenversawfireworks, wateredlawns, flewkiteoverflanderspark,
sawCousinRichiehitoneoutofthepark, atedinnertogetheratKris's, laughedtilmysideshurt,
taughtshannontokeepJudyquiet, wentbacktoCasperfoundmybirthdaypresentbook, wenttoWright,Gillette,Deadwood. atereally goodfoodthere, watchedCathywinlotsandmomanddadhitthewheeloffortunejackpot,
didntgettoseeBillHickokgetshot, butsawasmalldinosaurspawandhead, hadthebestpieinHillCity
andboughtafewrocks, wenttoJeffCity, (timsfamoushangout) andhuntedforagatesfoundatumbleweedandmailedittoSouthCarolina, wenttolunchanddinnerswithmostofmybookclubfriends, thenreturnedtoDenver, paintedadresserandthepaintdidntstick, boughtasewingmachine, madesomecurtainsthatwrinkled, icepackedShannonsheadwhenthespeakerfellonhim,
icepackedhisheadagainwhenhefellonthelittlelegotableandwasgrowinganantler, wenttothezootoseethepolarbearsandpenquins, wenttoarockiesagame, didntgotoBodyworks
II(toomuchofachicken) gotsickonShannonsbirthday, celebratedbirthdaywithShannonsfamily, didntwatchTimgetatattoo, gotonairplaneandcametoAtlanta, foundthecardrovehome,
gotthebestmessagefromgirlfrienddonthavetobebacktoworkuntilthursday,
sawfavoritedaughterwhogrewwhileIwasgone, huggedherandwenttobed.

In all this driving backandforth, and all the partying and fun, I have to make an observation. This summer was surprisingly filled with tons of Rules and I felt like I didnt get the same game edition that everyone was playing with. For instance:
Shannon rules:
1. He cannot be on the stairs by himself. He can climb the basement stairs but he cannot climb the second floor. ]
2. He cannot climb on the couch.
3. He cannot touch the new tv.
4. He cannot touch the remotes.
5. He cannot touch the fireplace.
6. If he does climb on the couch he cannot touch the speakers.
7. If he is on the middle floor, he cannot touch the glass top table or the contents therein.
8. He cannot touch the table by the front door or the contents therein.
9. He cannot touch the cat dish, or a speaker will fall on his head and make a mark that you cannot get off with spit.
10. He cannot have toys when he is eating. ( Actually this is an admirable rule.)
11. He shouldnt not be allowed to feed the dog his snacks.
12. He cannot eat goldfish snack crackers. Ok only this once.
13. The foods he is allowed to eat are baby foods and things that are organic. Kool-Aid is certainly not in that field.
14. He can have small amounts of ice cream, but not so much as to give him brain freeze.
15. He is not allowed to have more than 6 ounces of milk at a time, even though he throws the empty bottle at you and says I want more.
16. 6 ounces is 4 scoops of Similac not 2. ( I read that one on the can.) I was giving him "lite" formula.
17. He was not allowed to play with things in the kitchen like pots and pans, but I advocated for him and now he is, but he isnt suppose to sit in the dishwasher and help you put the plates in there.

It took me 4 days to break all these rules, and 6 weeks to learn them and my son would say, she really didnt learn them.

Rules in Casper:

1. If you borrow Moms car ask her although I was confused on this because Dad was the one who lined me out on what to do and when to be home.
2. If you borrow Moms car fill it with gas before you bring it home.
3. Leave the keys on the front seat.
4. Turn your wheels slightly as you back out of the driveway or you will scrape the bottom of car.
5. Dont let the cats out, because they do not know who you are and wont come to clacking cans even if you act like you are Cathy.
6. Without a doubt this is the strangest rule and in fact so strange that it is what prompted me to write this whole blog:
My sister, who is not considered the faint of heart by anyone, has this rule. SHE does NOT Drive at dusk, evening or night and if you DO she is just freaky.
Her adventurous expeditions that you would think she would be out on every waking moment are completely stiffled by this rule.
Here is her reason: She might hit a deer. Ok that is relevant. THere are lots of deer, they are usually along side the road, but to NOT ATTEMPT to go because of a deer? I think she has Deerfobia. I tried to explain a similar theory that people have about going to the store they might get hit by a car, so they dont leave but a DEER???? How many has she hit? A number I dont need to know, I just know that very few things stop me from doing pretty much whatever Iwant to do or need to do, and on mylist deer never appears. Heres the real clincher-----------------She has the eyesight GOD gave a vampire bat. She can see caterpillers walking down a stock of sagebrush. Perhaps that is the reason.... Maybe she sees beyond what I see when I am driving.
( I am really going to pay for even bringing up this subject just so all my readers know. )

Here is another one of her rules. This one is great, and if you learn one thing from her this should be it.
When you put your money in a gambling machine, always bet 3 or the max. Dont bet just one, because you will never get the payoff. ( I think Dad was living proof of this atleast 3 times in Deadwood.) Also Cathy Theory, hit the button to spin the wheel and every so often pull the handle manually, it confuses the machine. Ok you might think she is off her mark here, but I have seen her win, and the best part was when we only had 1.75 left, she had to give me 4 quarters or we would have had to walk back to hotel instead of riding the tram, she had 75cents left and put it in to finish off the night and hit 40$. We stayed until it was gone. What fun!!!!

Well I know you think I lead the life of luxury, 6 week vacations with the coolest kid in Denver, you are right, I do. My only advice to you, is that even though schools are the worst paying jobs in the country, the vacations are awesome.

Have a great rest of the summer, there is still 6 weeks left to get your tan.
Lisa