Epic Songs
I was pretty well ready to write what I thought was a funny blog today, until I went to my son's blog. I m not funny--he is. But heres my attempt.
Going to work every morning I listen to a radio program that has a contest for naming old Country Western songs and the artists.
The other day they played a song, I had never ever heard of but wish I could answer, this is truly useless information you might need on Jeopardy. Probably not.
The song just started off about this sad guy blues, and lovingly broke out into the chorus,
" I'm the only Hell my
mother ever raised." I laughed so hard I had to pull the car over. I sincerely thought is was a joke. I continued to listen while crying through the laughter, and realized it was a real song. OMG It gets better. The song continues with 3 more sad verses.
At the end, All I could think of was, the song Elizabeth wrote about Shitty Red Roof Inn, is sure to be hit. When the DJ comes back on in his southern style, saying, "Hello you are on WEZL, whats the name of that song?" and a lady I can only picture clearly as Larry The Cable-Guy's Mother answers, "Johnny Paycheck, I'm the only hell my mother ever raised."
"Ding Ding Ding ,You are a winner!" to which she replies, " I love that song, I play it all the time on my 8 tracks."
At this point, I am dying. I am done!!! I cannot drive the car. I have to pull over again. She goes on to say that "he is her favorite sanger and did you ever hear the one he did about sitting on the curb outsiden church?"
Now I cannot breath, and am seriously late for work. The dj replies, "Yes, Ma'am and I love that too, I think thats one of his greats. "GREATS!!!!!! Johnny Paycheck had GREATS!!! "Take this Job and Shove it" sold millions but was it GREAT?Heres a great country song, JUST READ THE CHORUS and the same DJ agrees with me or so he said the next day.
Ok I have to get to work so I drive like Im late, and arrive at work, my friend Sue says is everything ok, you look like you have been crying. I say as casually as I can, I say yeah sorry I am late, I was listening to the radio. ( I thought was probably the most clever sorry I am late excuse I have ever thought of, and its the first truthful one I have ever told.) and went to my office to begin my key punch day.
I sent Elizabeth an email and told her to work on those Red Roof Inn lyrics, I think I found a way to make a million bucks.
Shitty Red Roof Inn – Elizabeth H.
You go to the front office to get some soap
The clerk’s behind thick glass
“What the hell is this!” you pound
She replies with sass,
“You should’ve known better
Than to stay at a Red Roof Inn
And you shouldn’t have left your room
Because all your shit has been stolen”
Chorus
Shitty Red Roof Inn
Shitty Red Roof Inn
You should have known better
Than to stay at Red Roof Inn
Your room is never cleaned
The blood is still on the wall
The guy that got stabbed last night
Is staying down the hall
The housekeepers steal the shit
You shouldn’t have brought anyway
You should’ve known better
Look how much you have to pay.
Chorus
At 2 am some car doors slam
and bullets fly by your head
Someone’s come back
For the stab victim down the hall
There knocking on your door instead
Lying in bed the fire alarm goes off
You can sense no smoke
You walk outside your room to see
If it’s another Red Roof joke
The clerks comes out to address the crowd,
And explain why I am awake
“It’s not my fault the alarms so loud
Room 202 just had to get baked”
Shitty Red Roof Inn
Going to work every morning I listen to a radio program that has a contest for naming old Country Western songs and the artists.
The other day they played a song, I had never ever heard of but wish I could answer, this is truly useless information you might need on Jeopardy. Probably not.
The song just started off about this sad guy blues, and lovingly broke out into the chorus,
" I'm the only Hell my
mother ever raised." I laughed so hard I had to pull the car over. I sincerely thought is was a joke. I continued to listen while crying through the laughter, and realized it was a real song. OMG It gets better. The song continues with 3 more sad verses. At the end, All I could think of was, the song Elizabeth wrote about Shitty Red Roof Inn, is sure to be hit. When the DJ comes back on in his southern style, saying, "Hello you are on WEZL, whats the name of that song?" and a lady I can only picture clearly as Larry The Cable-Guy's Mother answers, "Johnny Paycheck, I'm the only hell my mother ever raised.""Ding Ding Ding ,You are a winner!" to which she replies, " I love that song, I play it all the time on my 8 tracks."
At this point, I am dying. I am done!!! I cannot drive the car. I have to pull over again. She goes on to say that "he is her favorite sanger and did you ever hear the one he did about sitting on the curb outsiden church?"
Now I cannot breath, and am seriously late for work. The dj replies, "Yes, Ma'am and I love that too, I think thats one of his greats. "GREATS!!!!!! Johnny Paycheck had GREATS!!! "Take this Job and Shove it" sold millions but was it GREAT?Heres a great country song, JUST READ THE CHORUS and the same DJ agrees with me or so he said the next day.
Ok I have to get to work so I drive like Im late, and arrive at work, my friend Sue says is everything ok, you look like you have been crying. I say as casually as I can, I say yeah sorry I am late, I was listening to the radio. ( I thought was probably the most clever sorry I am late excuse I have ever thought of, and its the first truthful one I have ever told.) and went to my office to begin my key punch day.
I sent Elizabeth an email and told her to work on those Red Roof Inn lyrics, I think I found a way to make a million bucks.
Shitty Red Roof Inn – Elizabeth H.
You go to the front office to get some soap
The clerk’s behind thick glass
“What the hell is this!” you pound
She replies with sass,
“You should’ve known better
Than to stay at a Red Roof Inn
And you shouldn’t have left your room
Because all your shit has been stolen”
Chorus
Shitty Red Roof Inn
Shitty Red Roof Inn
You should have known better
Than to stay at Red Roof Inn
Your room is never cleaned
The blood is still on the wall
The guy that got stabbed last night
Is staying down the hall
The housekeepers steal the shit
You shouldn’t have brought anyway
You should’ve known better
Look how much you have to pay.
Chorus
At 2 am some car doors slam
and bullets fly by your head
Someone’s come back
For the stab victim down the hall
There knocking on your door instead
Lying in bed the fire alarm goes off
You can sense no smoke
You walk outside your room to see
If it’s another Red Roof joke
The clerks comes out to address the crowd,
And explain why I am awake
“It’s not my fault the alarms so loud
Room 202 just had to get baked”
Shitty Red Roof Inn
the best part about this post, is that the picture of "Brandine" is right next to a part talking about Libis. Did you do that on purpose? And if not, I think we found a halloween costume for her.
Posted by
Brokenmandible |
9/24/2006 3:01 PM